Friday, December 19, 2014

Getting Current, Holiday Edition

The past couple of months have been a total drag.  Business is down and I'm working feverishly trying to turn the ship around, but it's not looking good.  I'm hoping that 2015 is a better year, because this year was the worst in my career.

Audrey and I have seen each other twice since we were with E & K.  We have tried multiple times to hook up with other couples during this time, but we haven't been successful.  We've found time and again that the people with whom we thought we were dealing weren't legitimate, or they were just flakes, or they deliberately misled us as to what they wanted.

There was the young couple who reached out to us to get together, having seen all our pictures, only to stop texting and emailing us altogether.  We had no way of knowing why they did this, so we just had to assume that their parents never taught them how to be polite.  There was the guy who said he and his girl wanted to meet, but then he confessed that he couldn't convince her to go along with him. There was the couple in their 30s who turned out to be a single man collecting naked pictures of girls. And there was the girl in her 20s who wanted to make sure that Audrey was OK with her man's 9.5 inch penis and his desire for totally rough sex -- right after she said, "We'll of course respect any and all of your boundaries."

Sometimes I feel like Audrey and I are the only people on earth with any integrity.  We put our real pictures out there, we say exactly what we want, we politely decline any requests we don't like, we trust each other enough to know that we can speak for both of us when we're speaking individually to potentials, and we actually answer every text and/or email we get, even just to say, "We'll take a pass, thanks anyway."

One of the things Audrey and I have started doing when dealing with potential swing partners is to require that every couple send over a current picture of the two of them together.  Usually the pic has a date stamp on it or they hold up a paper with a reasonably current date written on it.  That way, we know they're a couple.  We've also agreed to let them send separate photographs if each picture has them doing the same thing, such as flashing a peace sign or touching a finger to the nose.  We even apologize for asking, but we let them know that we've been burned too often and we don't want to waste anyone's time.  If we don't have pics like that within a couple of hours, we know they're fake or just too lazy to prove otherwise.

To offset the frustration around swinging, Audrey and I had an especially great time our last time together.  Instead of just fucking our brains out, we made love.  Yes, that's right, the arrangement has crossed the Rubicon and we find ourselves emotionally bonded.  I'm still keeping my distance around this because there's no way I want to repeat the same mistakes I made before, with C, Jade, and Leah. She wants to see me more often, so we're going to shoot for one-on-one dates every other week and swinging dates in between.  Obviously her visits from Aunt Flo will have to be factored in there, but it looks like we'll be doing that come next year.

As for new potential swing partners, we have L&J, a very attractive younger couple; P&C, a Latino couple in their 30s; S&W, a very fit couple in their early 40s; C&H, a hipster couple in their 20s; and A&N, a couple in their 30s who like to play bareback but will go covered until we trust each other. And there's still E&K, with whom we stay in contact and with whom I would go for again just to make sure my performance issue was a one-time thing.

Last thing: I have been communicating regularly with a 22-year-old girl in NYC who had been in a sugar relationship with a married man.  He no longer engages in sugar but they still see each other from time to time.  From what I gather, this relationship is totally dysfunctional, in that he can't stay away from her even though he knows nothing good will ever come from seeing her, and she has fallen in love with him to the point where she doesn't want to have sex with anyone else.  It's a hot mess, actually, because she knows he'll never leave his wife and she can't move on.  After weeks and weeks of trying to shed light on the matter for her so she'll find the courage to move on, I have given up and ended the relationship.  I have dug the well for her, shown her the well, and given her the tools for her to draw from the well, but she won't drink.  Oh well.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

Monday, October 27, 2014

A New Couple

Lemme tell ya, this swinging adventure sure teaches me a lot about myself.  One thing I learned: I'm not great at hiding my feelings when I'm disappointed or bummed out.


Last week, Audrey and I had a date with E&K, a couple we met on Craigslist. The ad featured pictures of K without her face: in a white bikini, in a college t-shirt.  Still the ad compelled me to write them.  They left a phone number on the ad, so I texted them with pics of Audrey and myself.  K responded fairly quickly with more pics of both of them.  K was a blonde with great tits, and E was a bald, physically fit guy.  We soon made arrangements for her and Audrey to talk over the phone.  Audrey reported back to me that K and E seemed really cool and that a date was made for Friday early afternoon.  Since I knew that E was bisexual, I made sure to tell K that I was straight and that this would only be a girl/girl bi day.  E was totally cool with it.


I picked Audrey up at noon, with a fresh box of condoms ready to play.  We kissed in the car and briefly got caught up as we drove the 20 minutes from her place to theirs.  She had gotten over her flu and felt much better, so she was animated and excited to have some fun.


We parked the car and E met us with a parking permit to avoid getting a ticket.  The older apartment building was in a great neighborhood so we instantly felt safe. 


E talked, with passion, NON-STOP, all afternoon!  He was totally cool and very funny.  K was chill and cute, but, if I'm being totally honest, not as cute in person as in her pics (or perhaps as cute as I'd wanted her to be).  She was about 5'5" and 130 lbs., with shoulder length blonde hair.  Her big blue eyes dominated her oval face, even though she had a rather pronounced nose.  I didn't find her unattractive, but she wasn't quite my type.  Still, I was there, Audrey was excited, and I knew that at least I'd get to fuck her at some point during the date.  E offered drinks right away, which I declined (had to go home and face DW without alcohol on my breath), as well as some pot (again, I declined).  Audrey accepted a drink, and they brought her a very full cup of vodka.  E&K helped themselves to can after can of Bud Lite.  I think they each drank 8-10 during the afternoon. That sort of explained K's slight belly. 


E&K and Audrey took up the leather couch, while I sat in an armchair next to E.  The conversations were very animated and fun, as we discussed all the various things on display in E's apartment.  K had her own place, although she practically lived there.  E worked in TV and had autographed pictures of musicians, actors, athletes, etc.,  as well as an Epiphone Les Paul guitar autographed by some very prominent rock stars.  I found him very interesting!  Audrey and K went to the backyard to visit E's two dogs (which were off limits to me because one of them was a biter and bit only men).


After a couple of beers and half of Audrey's vodka, E invited me to join Audrey on the couch, so we all crowded there.  The making out began almost immediately.  I got Audrey out of her shirt and bra, while E slipped K out of her sundress, revealing nothing but cotton underwear.  We then swapped at that point. 


Since I was only somewhat attracted to K, I let her take the lead.  Soon I was naked and she was going down on me, while E went down on Audrey.  K's BJ skills were excellent, lots of spit and stroking.  I got very hard.  Audrey came almost immediately, but E kept going.  He took off his jeans and underwear and started grinding on Audrey's pussy.  I started going down on K's blonde, fuzzy pussy. She tasted fresh and clean, and I put two fingers inside her wetness.  "Bedroom!" he announced, and we all got up at the same time.


In hindsight, I sort of wish he hadn't done that, because in the time it took for us to resume our playing, I'd lost my erection.  Had we simply played right then and there, I might have had less difficulty getting hard again.  I liked almost everything about K, but I didn't like her face all that much, so kissing her just didn't get me going.  On top of that, I'd been so horny about this date that I'd masturbated three hours earlier.  I didn't know my body was going to need help to keep my cock hard.  But ah, being older has its drawbacks! 


K wanted to fuck me, as E and Audrey were totally going at it right next to us and Audrey was climaxing practically every minute.  We slipped on a condom and K got on top of me.  I lasted maybe a minute or two before I felt myself getting soft.  K leaned down to me and asked, "What do you like?"  At E's urging I grabbed her ass and pulled her close and whispered, "I love girls cumming on my cock."  As if I'd flipped a switch, K instantly had an orgasm.  Since I wasn't fully hard, her tightening pussy pushed me out of her.  I pulled off the condom, and put on a brave face.  "I'm totally having a blast," I said, as I confessed to my earlier self-play and added, "I guess next time I'll have to avoid jacking off!"  And I was telling the truth, since it totally turned me on to watch Audrey ride E's cock.  I stroked myself and got semi-hard while K joined E and Audrey.  I worried that perhaps I wasn't going to get off at all.  K tried to suck me harder, even going so far as to rim me, which totally turns me on, but it wasn't working.  K confessed to me that E had fucked her the night before till 3 a.m. so she hadn't gotten any sleep and they'd almost cancelled our date.  She said that, like me, she also didn't feel like she was at her best.  Still we agreed to keep trying.  I liked K; she was sweet and affectionate, and hilarious, especially in her interactions with E.  They had been together for five years, and it showed.


We all took a break, more beers came out, and K and Audrey went back to the backyard to hang and drink some more.  E and I talked on the bed and got to know each other better.  The man had amazing stories of his travels.  In his mid-40s he'd been all over the world, seen thousands of concerts (including 110 Grateful Dead shows!), and worked on some fantastic films and TV shows. 


We checked several times what K and Audrey were doing outside, sitting there naked in the backyard.  They were chatting away quietly, petting the dogs, and laughing it up.  Finally, they came back inside and joined E and me in the bedroom.  K had gotten out her double-headed dildo and lubed it up.  She and Audrey both came two or three times.


Later, while E was fucking Audrey again and I watched, K slipped on her strap on dildo and then fucked Audrey with it, both on top of her and cowgirl style.  Audrey, what a fucking trouper, just took it all, screaming with ecstasy with every orgasm!  I fingered K's pussy while Audrey was on top of her, and K came all over my hand, a gusher.  She'd squirted!


The girls were spent, so we took yet another short break.  I had maybe an hour to go before I had to leave, and I wanted to get off, so I grabbed hold of my cock and made myself hard, then grabbed Audrey.  I got on top of her and kissed her and let my dick slide right into her ridiculously wet pussy.  E&K fucked next to us, with their feet near our heads!  Audrey pulled me close and told me how good it felt to have me inside her, and she came again, and then again!  I'd never seen Audrey so totally turned on; I knew that this couple would get a second chance.  Even though I wasn't totally attracted to K, she was cute enough that if I don't jack off ahead of time, I'll keep the erection.  She also said that she was clean and on birth control, so she'd let me fuck her bareback. 


I felt myself very close to coming twice, but it never happened for me.  By that point we were all exhausted and decided to get dressed.  We agreed that we'd see each other again, and that there'd be a minimum of "getting to know you" time.  "Just walk in and take off your clothes," E said, "you know why we're all here!" 


As I drove Audrey home, we talked about how much fun we'd had.  "I was the only one who didn't cum," I said, pouting.  Since I had somewhere to be as soon as I dropped her off, there was no way I could fuck her some more and get to climax.  As I kissed her goodbye, we made a date for the following week, just the two of us.  She enthusiastically agreed; I guess she really likes my company.  Or, perhaps, my money.  But either way, I know I'll enjoy the sex.


KEEP READING future posts for our next couple adventure, M&A, which is already set up for next week.

Friday, October 17, 2014

A Short Breather, and a Reflection

Audrey texted me this morning to tell me that she'd been up all night with a fever and was at the doctor.  Why, I thought, would a fever need a doctor's attention?  Turns out she has the flu.  Poor kitten, she'll be on her back (not getting fucked) for the next week or so.


Meanwhile, we have multiple options with regard to couples to play with.  At last count we have four potentials: a couple each about 40 (both very good looking), a young couple about 30 (my faves, she has short hair and long legs), the couple we were supposed to see yesterday which didn't work out because the girl got a visit from Aunt Flo, and another Latina/Middle Eastern couple mid-30s.  I've let them all know we're down for the count the next two weeks as Audrey heals up.


Meanwhile, no posts about swinging till then.


On the home front, DW and I haven't really touched each other sexually for about three weeks.  At this point I'm nearly ready to give up hoping that our marriage will be sufficiently sexual at any time in the remaining years of my life.  I'm formulating in my mind a way to re-introduce the idea of an open relationship experiment. 


My thinking goes like this: I can be the model husband and father, showing her that I'm fully present, and caring for the family financially, and she'll still be uninterested sexually.  It's fairly obvious that sex is one of the last things on her mind as it pertains to the marriage.  Even if she were to offer herself to me for sex more often than she does, it's not because she wants (or even likes) sex; it's because "the marriage needs it."  She and I would probably have an OK time even under those circumstances, but I'd be giving up so much of what I like about sex (which is almost everything she dislikes), and that's simply not acceptable to me anymore (it's why I do what I do!).  But even with all of that, our sexual incompatibility is not grounds for divorce, at least for me.  I propose an experiment, for one year, with a "hall pass."  I state my guidelines and do my best to come to agreement.  If she balks, then at least I asked, right?  She'll then know that this is what I'm thinking, and it'll be out in the open that I want it, for real.  And I won't let up until there's agreement.


I don't know, I guess I'm at the point where I'm saying, "What the fuck?  Go for it.  It's not like I've got that much more to lose."

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

No Quickie

The late night quickie did not pan out, I'm sorry to say.  Audrey made plans to go out later in the evening (like 10) and wanted me there earlier, but I couldn't change my plans.  Needless to say I was disappointed, more by the fact that she didn't manage the time well (either that or she didn't take this date seriously).
Instead, Audrey and I scheduled another swinging date with another couple.  These are two Latinos -- the guy is 38 and the girl is 24 and fucking cute!  Need to book a hotel, but they'll split it with me.
I'll catch you up on all the happenings Friday...

Monday, October 13, 2014

A Late Night Quickie?

Audrey is one game girl, I truly respect that about her.  This week we have a scheduled date with a Latino couple (she's 24, he's 38) that promises great fun.  The girl is fucking adorably cute!

However, I haven't had any sex since our encounter with H and L.  That was more than two weeks ago.  DW has been (pick one, tired, annoyed, pissed, depressed -- actually, pick them all) and we haven't been physically intimate.  Thought it might happen yesterday, but she's on another planet right now when it comes to sex.


So last night I had this text exchange with Audrey:
Me: Hi Kitten!  Hope you're enjoying your Sunday
A: I am, thanks.  Hope you had a fun weekend.
Me: Not bad.  I'm scary horny though.  Wish I could be with you right now.
A: :-)
Me: I'm having dinner with a friend tomorrow, but I'll be done about 9:30... want my cock?
A: Yes
Me: Just a quickie...think we could do that?
A: I think so
Me: Woo hoo
Tonight, around 10, I'll text Audrey from the street and she'll let me in.  My goal is to be naked within one minute, my dick in her mouth within two minutes, and in her pussy within 10 minutes.  I don't think I'll even get naked.  I'd like to fuck her on her couch, which is near a window that overlooks the pool.  Maybe someone will see us...


I plan to be on my way home by 10:30.




Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Swinging, International Style, Part 2

As I mentioned in my previous post, Audrey and I were hooking up with H & L, a married Saudi couple.  Audrey and I had finally broken the ice and started making out with each other to signal them that it was OK to start fooling around.  They certainly were a bit nervous, but once I kissed Audrey, I could see that H & L were off to the races!  Before I knew it, he had his pants down and standing while his wife dutifully sucked his smallish dick.




Shirtless and pants down around his ankles, H revealed that indeed, he was the hairiest man I'd ever seen.  As she peeled out of her dress, L showed that she had phenomenal curves.  Her tan skin just made me want to run over there and hammer her.  Even though she was a fuller-figured girl, she totally reminded me of You-Know-Who.  She wore a pinkish bra and a black thong, and looked angelic with her head of long, straight, black hair bobbing up and down on H's cock.




Eventually, the two guys were totally rock hard, but Audrey had plans.  She wanted to play with L!  Simultaneously, however, the two of them reached for each other and started kissing.  Audrey played with L's pussy for a bit and sucked on her luscious tits.  The dance had begun!  All the girl/girl play stopped at kissing and touching, though.  I think L was just too nervous to have Audrey go down on her.  Eventually, L reached for me and we started playing with each other.  I sat on their couch, in their small, smelly, messy apartment, watching a lovely, 24-year-old Arab girl eye my dick like a little girl eyes a new toy.  "Oh, wow," she whispered, "oh, wow."  She stroked it and kissed it and then went to fucking town!  "Very thick," she said.  "Yes," I replied, "yes it is."  I fondled her very real and very firm breasts while she thoroughly drenched me with her mouth.  Audrey was down the couch, kneeling in front of H and giving him some pretty amazing head herself. 




"Want to go to bed now?" H asked.  Loved the broken English!




Audrey and I held hands and followed them into their bedroom.  Equally messy, but a nice king-sized bed that would easily hold the four of us.  Audrey sucked me some more while L took care of her man.  I flipped Audrey over and started going down and fingering her, getting her to moan and then come, while H bypassed going down on his wife and just took her from behind.  Going back to focus on Audrey, I was startled to hear a very loud slap to my right.  H smacked his wife's ass hard!  Again and again.  And she appeared to love it.  Not a whole lot of noise coming from her, but the sound of their bodies mashing into one another turned me on, so I grabbed Audrey and had her get on top of me.  She rode me like the champ she is, but I wasn't into slapping her ass. I preferred instead to fill my two hands with her firm butt and slam my cock upward into her.  Watching L get pounded, I nearly came, but grabbed the base of my cock just in time so that I didn't.




I sort of lost track of the time, but it didn't take long before I heard H moaning and coming inside his wife.  Fuck!  His orgasm just ruined the treat Audrey and I had planned for L: a tag-team pussy licking!  Neither of us was going to put our tongues anywhere near her pussy now.  What a fucking disappointment.  They took a break and watched us fuck, with L stroking H's limp dick and trying to coax it back to life.  Hell, at 24 I was ready to go again in less than two minutes, particularly when there was a fucking hot girl around (I'm only slightly kidding; at 24 I was engaged to my first wife and totally monogamous, but she was fucking hot and I tried like hell to get it back up again). 




Audrey and I moved to doggy position.  I slammed into her with both hands on her hips, watching her slowly work up to an orgasm, her back arching ever so slightly more and more the closer she got.  When she came, she fell flat on the mattress and disengaged from me.  I pulled her up, and we moved to the foot of the bed, where she got on top of me again.  That near-climax had given me tons of stamina, and I just kept on going like the pink bunny with the bass drum and the sunglasses.  L and managed to get her husband hard again and she got on top of him.  With H's legs spread I had a pretty close up view of his Slim Jim going in and out of his wife's pussy.  That girl needed something thick and juicy, and I was going to get inside her soon.  Eventually, I tuckered out from fucking Audrey and pulled her close to tell her I needed a break.  Audrey got off me and joined the two of them, kissing L while H fingered her.  Fun to watch that!




A few minutes later, seeing that I was alone, L got off her husband and came over to me to suck me back to life.  Once I was hard enough, Audrey handed me a condom (she'd forgotten the lube) and I slipped it on.  I had L get on top and she slowly slid me inside her.  Once I was fully inside, L let out a loud moan and started bouncing up and down on my cock.  I had to kiss her, fuck!  I pulled her down to me and we kissed deeply.  I kid you not, this girl took both of my lips into her mouth and nearly sucked my face off!  She smelled so pretty and her hazel eyes were locked on mine.  I grabbed her ass and fucked her and hard as I could (great things, condoms!) while H continued to finger Audrey.  Audrey dug what H was doing because she came really hard on his hand.  After a few minutes of fucking L, I sensed that she really wanted to come, so I pulled her close, and I whispered, "I want you to come all over my dick, baby.  Just let it go and feel that cock inside you.  Come for me."  That did it, and L let loose with a huge, loud orgasm that shook her whole body.  "Oh wow," she said again, "oh, wow!  That was so nice!"  More face-sucking kisses. 




She got off me, and I remained at the foot of the bed, while Audrey, L and H got under the blankets and snuggled with each other.  "Hey," I said, "I'm the only one here who hasn't come yet! That's pretty unusual for me!"  How about that?  I had decades on these kids and I was still holding out. 




I crawled under the blanket next to Audrey and we all talked for a little while before Audrey excused herself to use the restroom.  While she was gone, the three of us talked a little, and I totally flirted with L.  Eventually I took her hand out of her husband's and put it on my still semi-hard dick.  She looked at H as if to say, "Are you OK with this?" and he nodded to her.  She came over and sucked me back to life again, kissed me, and this time took my cock and just put it inside her.  H had mentioned to me via text before we met that his wife was on birth control and she was OK with going bareback.  Since she'd fucked a lot of guys before I wasn't too sure of it, but I went with it. 




Right then, Audrey came back and saw me fucking L, so she grabbed a condom and walked over to the other side of the bed to fuck H.  Poor kid, those Trojan Magnum condoms were not his size at all!  She got it on him and tried to get on top of him, but his erection had already disappeared, so she decided instead to go down on him again.  (He revealed later that he had never used a condom before).  He got hard, but she wasn't going to fuck him without protection, smart girl!  She stroked him until he came again.  Meanwhile I still hadn't come, but I wanted to, so I went full out bareback with L.  It took another minute, and once I knew I'd reach the point of no return, I pulled out.  Pointing my cock at her, my jizz went all over her belly and her tits.  She spread it all over herself with her hands and then licked her fingers.  This girl is a fucking sex freak, I thought, and I resolved right there to fuck her again at my earliest opportunity!




H and L fucked one more time while Audrey and I spooned, kissed, and watched.  It only lasted a few more minutes and they gave up, both spent.  We chatted for a long while, mostly about cultural issues and travel.  I'd spent a fair amount of time in the Middle East in my early 30s so it was great to talk to people who could provide more insight.  It struck both Audrey and me that here were two American Jews having hot, illicit sex with two Muslims.  So much for the Mideast conflict, no?




It had gotten late, and I needed to leave, so I got out of bed first and got dressed in the living room.  Audrey wasn't far behind.  Eventually we were all in various stages of dress.  H came out of the bedroom with his cell phone and what looked to be an extendable holder for the camera to take a selfie of the four of us.  I wasn't keen on being photographed, so I insisted that he crop the photos to remove our faces.  It took forever, as this holder was a Bluetooth device that was supposed to activate the shutter control of the cell phone.  It wasn't working, so eventually he put it on a 10-second timer and we did it the old fashioned way. 




Pictures done and cropped, I hurried Audrey along.  Had to get home.  We hugged and kissed them and said we absolutely had a blast and hoped to make it happen again.  Everyone was happy as we slipped out their front door and into my car.




On the ride back, Audrey and I resolved to see them again, but Audrey wanted them to initiate contact to make it happen.  That told me that she hadn't been too excited with H, and I asked her about it.  She confirmed it: "He's the hairiest man I've ever known!"  But, she said, L was gorgeous and she really wanted the next time to be able to play with her.  I agreed.  Poor H!  He was the odd-man out in this hookup, but he'd still get his ass laid again.




Once we reached Audrey's place, I pulled over, gave her a kiss and was on my way.  I made it home at a time when DW and the kids were out, so I was able to get in a quick rinse-off shower and get dressed in my jeans and t-shirt before they arrived.




Post-script:  I texted H later that night --
Me: So much fun, you guys!  Audrey and I couldn't stop talking about how cute you guys are.
H: Same here.  But plz, for give (sic) me, I wasn't in good proformance (sic)
Me: It's totally ok.  I was nervous my first time too.
H: Because first time
H: I have not been with other girl before
WTF???!!!  This was only the second girl he'd ever fucked?!
Me: You are such a lucky man.  Your wife is beautiful!
H: Ur girl as well
Me: That's a lot of firsts for you!  First condom, first other woman, first couple...
H: Yes it is maybe this reason so give me second round plz
Me: LOL, no need to say please!
H: OK thnx a lot my wife is totally satisfied and she said u have the most thick dick ever had


There would be a round two for them.  L was worth it!

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Swinging, International Style, Part 1

After Audrey and I left our encounter with B and J, we discussed over the next several days whether we'd actually want to get together with them again.  As I did not find J attractive, I suggested we could find another couple more to our liking.  Audrey agreed, saying that she didn't like guys with long hair anyway.  So B and J were out.  That began our quest to find another couple for another swinging adventure.

Meanwhile, she and I got together twice more, once at her place and once at a hotel since a friend of hers was staying with her for a couple of weeks.  Good times, including photos and video of her sucking my dick.  She does not shy away from being photographed!

I signed us up for two swinging websites, Swing Lifestyle and Lifestyle Lounge.  These subscription sites promised far more opportunities to meet great people who enjoyed the swinging lifestyle, with more couples in our area, more parties to attend, and better ways to communicate other than Craigslist email.  Unfortunately, what I have found with these sites is that those willing to pay for subscriptions (about $29 a month) tended to skew older, fatter, and not at all close to the kinds of people Audrey and I preferred to fuck.  As I've mentioned in previous posts, my fantasy is to fuck young, slender, and highly sexual women.  If now I have to put up with another man in the room fucking my young, slender and highly sexual woman, so be it!  But I'm not compromising by agreeing to fuck a woman over 40 or 45 just to be able to say I'm swinging.  Unless, of course, she's ridiculously hot with an amazing body and insane sexual skills!  Audrey, likewise, doesn't want old, fat guys with too-hairy balls and a huge belly hanging over it.  So we agreed on the types of people we wanted.  For my part, I had to do a better drop of trimming my balls, and I had to lose some weight!  Didn't want to disqualify myself, right?

Since Craigslist's selection was younger, we decided to forego memberships at the swing sites and focus on finding whom we wanted.  We expected to sift through a lot of shit before we found a decent couple, but we weren't prepared for several disappointments.  One couple, visiting from the East Coast for a week or two and staying in a posh hotel, warmly received my opening email, sending back pictures of both of them.  They were under 35, professionals, and definitely in shape.  Audrey and I had a process, which was for me to do the initial reach-out, sending pictures of both of us with faces included, and requesting face pictures (most CL pictures were cropped to remove faces or creatively posed so that the cell phone blocked the faces, or simply had faces blocked out) and a real email address.  If they responded, and I liked their faces and the rest of their body pictures, I'd forward the email chain to Audrey, who would, if she liked them as well, shoot them her phone number so that the women could "voice verify" (provide proof that each couple was real).  This last step was crucial because we found that many of the CL posts claiming to be couples were actually single men who wanted to join a couple.  If there was no voice verification with a woman, there was no deal.

So this couple responded, and Audrey shot them her phone number, and the girls spoke.  We made plans for an evening right after Labor Day.  I gave DW a cover story and we were set.  The wife and I exchanged several emails and texts during the week leading up to our date about how excited we each were to be making this happen.  Unfortunately, as the evening approached, and I continued to scroll through CL ads, I kept seeing theirs pop up again.  I got the feeling that we would get bumped at the last minute for another couple.  This is exactly what happened. The night before I got a text from the wife saying that her husband had a business function the next night until 10 pm and that they were now unavailable. "Next time!" she wrote.  Audrey and I were disappointed to say the least.  But I didn't believe them. I sent a text that I kept seeing their ad on CL, and it felt like they had selected a different couple instead of us.  "It would have been better just to tell us that than to make up a story about your scheduling difficulty."  Since I didn't get a response, I suspect I nailed the real reason why it didn't happen.

Other couples turned out to be single guys or druggies.  Audrey actually met on her own with a couple one night. We had agreed that it was OK for us to play separately if the opportunity presented itself.  They were a Friends With Benefits couple like us, but they were 35 and 18 years old.  I was suspicious of them, but Audrey was willing to check them out.  If they were decent people we'd set something up.  An hour into her visit, however, the guy pulled out a bag of cocaine.  She said thanks, but I don't do drugs, and she left.  

Craigslist also had a fair amount of ads that suggested something called "PnP," which stood for "Party and Play."  This indicated that the poster intended to include drug use along with the sex. These were easy to avoid, along with ads that mentioned "Tina" (meth) or "Molly" (Ecstacy).

After several unsuccessful attempts, I ran across an ad a few days ago that caught my eye.  It did so because the poster had included more pictures (around 20) than any other ad I'd seen.  They were a married couple in their mid 20s, both dark haired and a little curvy.  The photographs mostly featured the girl and her very curvy body, but there were a lot of cock shots too. The guy was just about the hairiest dude I'd ever seen, except for his crotch, which was completely shaven.  I like my girls slender, and I know that Audrey isn't too keen on really heavy guys.  However, there was a sincerity to the ad copy that I liked, and it seemed completely unpretentious.  I responded and sent our standard pictures.  The guy wrote back that he found us "amazing," and let us know that they were available on the day Audrey and I were planning to get together.  He said they could even host at their apartment.  Since I thought they were nice, I sent the email chain to Audrey, who agreed with me that they were worth checking out.  The husband sent over two pictures showing their faces. They were definitely Middle Eastern, perhaps Persian (explained the hairiness).  Audrey sent her phone number, and after a number of texts and a phone conversation with the wife, we made plans to meet them at an upscale outdoor mall over coffee before heading to their apartment which was just a few minutes away by car.  The husband and I texted the morning of our date to confirm, and to go over some sexual details before we moved forward.  Turned out that his wife was not bisexual, but curious, and had never been with a girl.  They had never been with another couple, but had had many threesomes (presumably with other men).  He apologized that his English wasn't very good (their native language was Arabic), but I didn't mind it at all, and neither would Audrey.  He asked if we did anal sex, and I said no, and he asked if we'd be OK with recording the sex, and I said no, not yet. We felt good about all of this and left things eagerly anticipating our meeting.

I picked Audrey up at her place at 2:15 to be at the mall by 3.  We got their on time despite unusually heavy traffic.  It took far too long to find a decent parking space, but we managed.  The weather was sunny and warm, if not a little too warm.  I felt definitely overdressed in my business attire, but it was, after all, a work day for me.

We found H & L seated at the coffee shop.  H was dressed in a green polo shirt and ripped jeans, while L was in shades and a sundress that showed off her very shapely body (particularly her spectacular tits). We sat down and started to chat.  I was definitely in a chatty mood, as was H, while Audrey and L were quiet.  I didn't want to monopolize the conversation, so I used the fact that I had to pee as an excuse to exit the conversation so that the girls could break a little ice.

We learned that they were students on visas from Saudi Arabia, they were both 24, and they had been married for three years.  They were studying English which was required before they could take entrance exams for university.  He wanted to study Human Resources and she wanted to pursue Healthcare Management.  We found them to be articulate and very sweet.  He was definitely as hairy as his pictures indicated, but L was far more attractive in person than in her pictures.  Her body was thinner and she was more petite than I had thought.  I hadn't seen her eyes behind the shades, but her smile blew me away with her perfect white teeth.  I was definitely very attracted to her.  After a few minutes, including one or two brief awkward lulls in the conversation, I said, "So, how far away do you live?"  H understood that as the cue to end the conversation and head to their apartment.

Audrey and I headed to our car armed with their address.  Despite having a GPS, we got lost inside their huge apartment complex, but managed to make it there in about ten minutes.

They lived in a small one bedroom apartment on the second floor of a two-floor building.  The apartment was sparsely furnished and the carpeting was old and dirty.  There was a bottle of vodka next to the couch and the place needed to be cleaned up, but it would do.  Audrey enjoyed a couple of sips of vodka and lemonade while we all chatted some more.  It was feeling again like someone had to make a move, so I waited for Audrey to say something even remotely suggestive, and I leaned in to kiss her.   That prompted H and L to begin kissing too.  Before long, we were all naked and the girls were going down on us.

to be continued.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Ashley Madison is So Over

Because I had an Ashley Madison profile up years ago, and I've never taken it down, I still get twice-weekly updates showing me new members or new "matches" to my profile.  No offense to anyone who has managed to find anything useful or fun on that website, but for me, it has been one solid waste of bandwidth.

There are basically two classes of women on AshMad: the first are the "attached" women looking for something on the side.  That's fair enough, but I'd certainly never hook up with a married woman.  It's enough drama and risk to have one spouse engaging in extramarital sex.  Both the drama and risk have the potential to increase exponentially when there are TWO unsuspecting spouses, one of them being a husband.  Sorry, all you MILFs, I will avoid you every time.  The second class of women on AshMad are the single girls, most of them under 30, who are up for "Whatever Excites Me" or "Anything Goes."  Generally, when I scan down the profile to see what these women are specifically looking for, I usually see "Seeking a Sugar Daddy."  I'm sorry, but AshMad should not be a site for SBs to find SDs.  Brandon Wade, the founder of Seeking Arrangement and other sugar dating sites, should be suing AshMad for moving in on his territory!  Kidding, but if the reason single girls go on AshMad is to find a sugar daddy, I can't imagine there would be too much success.

Lately, though, I've noticed a third class of woman who is frequenting this website: single women looking for "Something Long Term."  Reading these profiles, it's clear that many of these women are looking for husbands or at least a long-term committed relationship of some sort. Excuse me, but What. The. Fuck?

What woman with a working brain would post a profile looking for a long-term relationship, or even a husband, on a website that was conceived to help married people cheat on their spouses?  Any woman posting a profile on that site to find a man for a long term committed relationship has to know that the VAST majority of the men on the site are looking for extramarital friends, not new wives on whom they can cheat in the future.  Reminds me of that great line in "Jurassic Park," when Jeffrey Goldblum's character, named Ian Malcom, is referring to his love life.  He says something like, "I'm always on the lookout for the next ex-Mrs. Ian Malcolm."

If you're reading this post and you are a single woman with an AshMad profile, and you're looking there for a husband or long-term boyfriend, please do yourself a favor: go back to OKCupid and Match.  You'll be much more successful there.

Friday, August 22, 2014

FOUR

For months (for years, actually), I've fantasized about having group sex with another couple.  I remember talking about it with C after we had our threesome with The Dancer.  I remember a time when my first wife and I discussed it, back in the mid 1990s.  To me, having sex with another couple seemed the hottest thing ever, the apex of sexual exploration.  What could be hotter than watching the woman you love (or at least like a lot) fuck another man or woman?  To this voyeur, nothing!

Audrey and I, since resuming our occasional hook-ups, have discussed this too.  Lying in her grey-sheeted bed after a great fuck, we'd often fantasize about things we'd like to do together.  And Audrey, being bisexual and a nympho, had nothing but enthusiasm for the idea.  It just took some initiative on our parts to make it happen.

My first attempts had me looking on CraigsList.  Everything can be found there, right?  I clicked on "Casual Encounters, and then the link for "mw4mw".  This turned up dozens of postings, some with photos, and some without.  Most of them posted their ages and many of them their specific locations, which made it easier for me to navigate.  But one thing I noticed was that the ads seemed to repeat every day, and that there seemed to be only about 20 couple or so posting these ads, with the occasional new one popping up every few days. I didn't respond to any of them yet; I really didn't know what I would say, since I was completely new at this sort of thing.  Audrey, however, thought that simple honesty and accurate photographs were the best choices.  After all, those choices were what led me to find her!  Smart girl!

In addition to CL, I signed up on a couple of "lifestyle" websites for swingers (one suggested by Audrey).  I uploaded photos, but mostly what I saw on these sites were a bunch of older, fatter, and not very attractive couples.  I actually wanted a hotter couple who resembled the hot girls I'd usually found on the sugar daddy website.  "You're going to have to look at a lot of ads before you find the one you want," Audrey told me.  "Just be patient and one will come along."

I even posted ads on CL, uploaded pictures of us.  Got a few responses, but nothing that jumped out at me. I was close to giving up, the way I sort of gave up hoping that C would arrange a threesome for us.  But instead, I decided to lower my standards and be open-minded.  At my age, was it really realistic to expect and hold out for a very hot couple who would fuck us without a financial incentive, when it took my financial offers to attract the hot women I fucked as a Sugar Daddy?

Once I relaxed the criteria, I noticed that there were far more options.  Eventually, I saw one on CL that really grabbed my attention. The headline read simply: "Lunch."  The ad showed a pair of exposed tits and a cropped blow job shot.  I responded with a nice note and got a response back from the guy (apparently, it's usually the guy who sets these things up).  We chatted for a bit, and we agreed, after sharing a few additional pics to get the girls involved.  I forwarded the email chain to Audrey and she wrote back, "I like them! They seem nice!  Let's meet them!"  The guy's GF responded in like fashion.  And then we revealed real names and shared some details about ourselves.

"B" was in his 40s, married (hah!) and had been with his mistress "J" for about a year.  They were not a sugar couple, but lovers that met through B's work in the healthcare field.  He lived about an hour away and J lived near where C used to live.  J had just separated from her husband, no kids.  B had two kids.

We agreed to meet one afternoon at a centrally located hotel, bring some wine and condoms, and see where things go.I got to the hotel on time, Audrey just a few minutes later.  I saw J wandering in the lobby with her cell phone to her ear.  She looked over at me a couple of times, but I wasn't sure she was who I thought she was, so I didn't approach.  But I was certain that she was checking me out and talking about me with B, who via text told me he had secured the room and was waiting upstairs.  Once Audrey showed up, we headed up to the room...

Answering the door was a mid-40s-looking guy with longer brown hair, dressed in a pink dress shirt and suit pants.  J was sitting on the bed, wearing a pink top and black leggings.  She had long brown hair and a nice smile.  Both B and J spoke with accents, although B's was very slight.  They revealed that they were both Latino.

We shared wine while sitting as couples on the separate beds.  B and J started to snuggle as we chatted.  It took about 20 minutes before I took the initiative and started kissing Audrey.  Within a few minutes we were all naked.  Wow, that was easy!

J had great breasts with dark nipples, but I have to confess that she was heavier and flabbier than I like.  In fact, going back through all the women I've been with over the past six years, J was the heaviest.  CC and Elle were both pretty flabby, but at least they were thin.  Watching J ride B's cock, I could see her belly flab going up and down with the rest of her.  It was not a pretty sight I have to admit, although it was cool to watch her suck his dick like a hungry animal.  I went down on Audrey and made her cum.  J came over and joined us, kissing Audrey while I was down on her.  B stood back and jacked off.  The whole scene was hot as fuck!

I'm not going to give the full play-by-play here, but I remember some great highlights.  J got on top of Audrey and kissed while they scissored each other.  Both of them came really hard.  B fucked J while J sucked my dick (nice).  B fucked Audrey in missionary position next to J and me.  Now, a lot of time has passed since we'd begun, I'd leaked a little jizz inside Audrey pretty early on, and I had to wear a condom, and I wasn't 100% knocked out by J.  I was not 100% hard either, and I tried to fuck J, but I lost my erection.  "Whew!" I said as I pulled out.  "Break time!"  It was swelteringly hot in the room.  I moved to the other bed while the three of them had fun.  Next, Audrey came over and kissed me while B fucked her from behind.  Again, I moved over to the other bed, condom now off, stroking my dick while Audrey climbed on top of B and started fucking him.  She must have had three orgasms.  The guy never got soft, even though he said he came ten minutes into fucking J at the very beginning.  I admired his stamina!  Watching them fuck got me hard, but I didn't want to fuck J.  J saw me masturbating and came over to help, taking my cock in her mouth.  She sucked like a champ, and I enjoyed every second of it.  It had been about an hour since we'd begun and I didn't want to hold back any longer.  I let go a blast of cum that got everywhere on the bed and in J's hair.

B and J then disappeared into the bathroom and fucked in the shower, while Audrey tried to revive me.  No go.  I was spent.  B and J came out and fucked some more, while Audrey and I spooned on the bed and watched.  The moment felt slightly romantic for me, as I held Audrey close, stroking her small tits, and rubbing her body with the other.  She turned her head toward me and we shared a whole mess of tender kisses.  Did we move to a different level?  I don't know; I'm not gong to think about that.

We left before they did, as they were still fucking as we slipped out of the room.  Audrey and I thought we'd see them again, but now I'm not too sure.  I'm not attracted to J so if we did get together, I think I'd avoid trying to fuck her.

We'll see if anything changes in the near future.  But Audrey and I did enter a new phase: the swinging phase!

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Update on My Life, Part 2

As I said in my previous post, I have essentially left the Sugar lifestyle, but did have a couple of slips back in the past five months.  I described two of them, which involved Audrey.  The third one involves Leah.


Right after seeing Audrey again, I'd started to miss Leah.  You will recall that Leah is the daughter of a woman who was a high school classmate and a current friend on Facebook.  I ended the arrangement with Leah because I had been unable to wrap my head around these two facts and feel good about sleeping with her daughter.  Over the next several months, however, it had occurred to me that, perhaps, I didn't really need to do that at all.  As I saw it, Leah's mom and I did not regularly communicate, and it was entirely possible for me to continue seeing her daughter without hurting anyone.  Getting caught with Leah would have, of course, been devastating, but if DW would have found out, it wouldn't matter to her that Leah was the daughter of a Facebook friend or a complete stranger -- I'd be divorced either way.  And, since I'd long ago accepted the consequences of the sugar lifestyle, it wasn't very difficult to make this choice.


I contacted Leah, who was understandably reluctant to hear me out.  I'd written a while back on the blog of my friend Exa, now a well-regarded "sugar matchmaker," that an attempt to reach out to Leah on a platonic basis just a week after ending the arrangement fell completely flat: "... she was cold and distant, insisting that if I wasn’t going to be seeing her sexually, it didn’t make much sense to have a platonic friendship. In other words, no “arrangement” money, no contact."  Still, I pressed on, saying that I wanted to see her, as before, and try to build an actual intimate connection with her.  I said I'd even like to take her out in public on occasion.  She agreed to see me, but insisted on keeping things in her bedroom for now.  Right, I texted her.  Trust to rebuild, things to discuss around that.  No problem, I thought.  She sent me a picture of herself, in a flowery bikini and sarong.  She explained that she was in Hawaii and would text me after she returned.


The day before our scheduled date at her place, I sent her a text I'd simply felt was appropriate: Have you had a significant change to your relationship status since we last saw each other?  She replied that, yes, she was dating someone, but said it wasn't serious.  I thanked her for telling me, and asked her to tell me if it became a serious relationship because "that would, of course, change everything."  She said she didn't understand, but I said we'd discuss it the next day.


Our date was for 10 am the next morning.  She was to leave her door unlocked, and I'd sneak into bed with her.  For the first 45 minutes, we said almost nothing to each other.  Seeing her in a cut-up football jersey, out of which her beautiful breasts fell, I said, "Wow, look at you."  The only thing she said to me was, "Oh my God, I'm coming!"  It was the first orgasm she'd ever had with me.  The story in my head was that she was super-turned on by this morning encounter.  She explained later that she'd stopped using her vibrator so she could experience orgasm through sex.  The only downer about this sexual encounter was that she was insisting on condoms now.


While lying in bed with her, I began asking her about this new guy she was dating.  She said he was 34, Jewish, lived about 45 minutes away, and was going through a divorce.  She'd met him a year earlier on Seeking Arrangement, and that he wanted a real relationship with Leah.  She said she'd consider it if he were no longer married.  He had no kids.  I asked how long she'd been with him, and she said she'd been seeing him about three months.  "Three months?" I said.  "That means you started seeing him right after we last saw each other.  I thought you said you had no room in your life for dating." She confirmed that, but attributed it to her heavy workload at school, which was now over.  "So that picture you sent me from Hawaii...you were with him?" I asked.  "Yes," she replied, giggling.  "I had sex with him the first time there."  I scrunched up my face at her and said, "You made him wait two months to have sex with you?  Why?"  "I wanted to see if he was serious," she said.  Well, wasn't it obvious that a guy who divorced his wife to be with her and looked her up again after a year, ready to date her, was serious?  I sat up and looked at her.  "Oh, Leah, this changes everything."


"What do you mean?"


"You told me yesterday that this wasn't a serious relationship.  But it is.  You wouldn't test a guy to see if he was serious unless you were also serious.  You're in a serious relationship!"


"OK," she said, "but I don't see what that has to do with us."


I now understood why she didn't want to keep things in her bedroom.  She didn't want to risk being seen with me.  "Leah, I was clear with you that I never do these things with women who have husbands or boyfriends.  I made that mistake once before and got terribly hurt in the process."


"So, what is it you want from me, exactly?"


"I want to build an intimate relationship with you, to connect on a level that goes beyond our dates.  I want us to care about each other, and share things with each other.  I know that will take time, that we would need to rebuild trust and learn along the way, and I'm willing to put in that time, but your serious relationship makes that impossible now."


"You're married, Porter."


"My marriage isn't an obstacle to what I want, Leah.  You knew going into this that I was married.  In the beginning you opened up to me, no problem, and we really worked on getting to know each other.  Of course, that was before the boyfriend entered the picture."


Leah sat up and raised her voice.  "You're not making any sense to me.  I just want this to be an NSA thing, where we get together and have fun for a couple of hours.  Are you forgetting that we met on an arrangement site?"


"The same site where you met this guy," I interjected.


"Whatever."


"I am investing in this, and so I want what I want."


"Good luck with that.  Porter, you're married and unavailable to anyone except your wife.  It's completely delusional to think that you could have what you're looking for with a single girl.  There are only two reasons why a single girl would sleep with a married man: to get his money, or to break up his marriage."


I swung my feet off the bed onto the floor and reached for my underwear, standing up to pull them on.  I smiled.  "Well, Leah," I said, reaching for my socks, "you're just wrong.  I had a three-year intimate relationship.  I'm sure that there was an element of superficiality there, but I'm just as sure that there was a period of time where I had exactly what I am looking for now."  I started putting on my shirt.  "Intimacy is what makes these arrangements enjoyable and fulfilling for me.  Intimacy makes the sex better, and makes us both better people.  I experienced that, and it was awesome."  I was stepping into my pants now.  "If I can't have intimacy, then this --" I gestured to her and the bed and the bedroom -- "becomes just sex for money, and that's exactly the opposite of what I want.  I know you have no interest in breaking up my marriage, so that means all you really want is my money.  You never gave a shit about me.  I'm such a stupid fool.  You were playing me from day one."  I leaned over toward her, as she sat still on the bed.  "And if that's what you want, fine, but it basically makes you a whore."


I strode into her living room, my footfalls thudding on her hardwood floor.  I put on my ring, my watch, stuffed my wallet into my pocket, and slung my briefcase over my shoulder.  And then I had a thought. I grabbed the envelope I'd left on her coffee table and walked to the front door, past her dog.  "Goodbye, Leah," I said loudly, opening the door and letting it slam as I closed it.


A few minutes later as I sat at a red light, I got a text from her. "You're a fucking asshole."  "Yes," I replied, "one with my money back in my 'fucking asshole' pocket."


I later deleted every text, email, photograph, every remnant of Leah that ever existed.  I also unfriended her mother on Facebook.  The last thing I wanted to see was a post with Leah's picture on it. 


If the daughter of a high school friend, with brains, beauty and a winning personality, can brazenly play me like that, then I am absolutely off track in so many ways.  I've written before that this doesn't work without the money.  Even Leah can't manage to transcend that cynical reality.  And so, I stick with Audrey.  She is no great thinker.  She speaks in an annoyingly loud voice.  She's not even a striking beauty.  And that makes things much easier for me to keep things superficial.  As we prepare for our first swinging encounter with another couple, I feel secure knowing that I have no real attraction to Audrey other than her sexuality.  This is as it should be.


Meanwhile, this truly made me appreciate DW in a way I hadn't anticipated.  That afternoon, I raced into the house after work, kissed my kids, pet the dog, and threw my arms around her and kissed her all over.  "What's up with you?" she laughed.  "I just love you, babe."

Update on My Life, Part 1

Hello, dear readers!  It's been nearly five months since I posted anything on this blog, when I said goodbye to sugaring (and I meant it).  In that time I have essentially stayed 100% clear of the sugar world, although I had a couple of slips.  My sex life has definitely deteriorated but there is hope for improvement in a few areas.


I wrote in my farewell post --
with a renewed commitment to working things through with DW, my heart simply hasn't been in it to continue searching for quality girls.  On top of that, the financial toll it has taken on me and my family to continue doing this has been at times very large.  It no longer makes emotional or financial sense for me to continue in the Sugar Bowl.

This year has been the worst year of my career, worse than right after the economic crash of 2008.  My income is down 80% and I just don't have the means to carry on a sugar relationship right now.  So I have focused on career building and relationship building with DW. 


On the career front, I have an exciting new prospect that will take me out of the business that I'm in right now and set me on a path of senior executive leadership in the next five years.  Meanwhile, I am researching returning to school to earn an MBA and further improve on my chances of securing lasting employment at a senior executive level.  I hope that these moves will put me in a more lucrative path toward retirement in the next 15-20 years. 


On the marriage front, DW and I have grown significantly closer.  We are more intimate, laugh more, agree more on parenting and money management, and disagree far less than we did this time last year.  We haven't really improved in the area of physical intimacy, but we've had a recent development that holds a bit of promise.  DW visited her OB/GYN because she was concerned that sexual intercourse had actually become painful for her.  She wasn't getting wet, and not even lubricants were helping.  She told me, "I know you're miserable, and I don't want you to feel that way."  The doctor's examination showed that, indeed, there was a problem, and he prescribed an estrogen-based cream for her to use daily.  We've had sex once since she began this regimen, and it was more enjoyable for both of us.  Nothing earth-shattering, but certainly it felt good to be close to DW again.


Now, I know you're all probably curious to know about the couple of slips I had since stepping out of the sugar lifestyle.  There were three, actually: two with Audrey, and one with Leah.  With Audrey, we had begun a dialogue, shortly after I wrote my last post, about my financial difficulties and how I wanted to see if we could keep things going between us without a specific arrangement.  She was open to a "friends with benefits" type of relationship between us, but still needed occasional financial help.  I couldn't agree to anything significant, but I could scrape together a little cash each time we got together.  I didn't want to start anything, however, until she had her own apartment.  It made no sense to pay for hotels as well.  She finally got a place in mid-May, but wasn't ready for visitors for a couple of weeks.  She had a cute one-bedroom place on the ground floor of a newer complex, with a patio that overlooked the pool.  The bedroom was cozy and she had a nice queen-size bed.  And two cats -- ugh.  One of them just hid under the bed the second I walked in the door, but the other wanted to be my new best friend, particularly when I was going down on Audrey.  I managed to work around it, but I knew this would not be an ideal situation for us.  Still, it was better than a room at the local Best Western.  The second time, however, she asked me to meet her at her parents' house, since she was still packing up some of her things and was going to be alone their most of the afternoon.  We had sex in their spare bedroom, amid computers and very dated knick-knacks.  A very unpleasant experience for me.  I was so turned off that I couldn't even bear to shower in the house.  As I left, I said, "You know I love having sex with you, Audrey, but I don't ever want to do this here again."  She laughed and agreed.


One good thing that came from these two sessions, however, was that our discussion turned to ways we could spice things up.  Audrey was slightly experienced in the swinging lifestyle, and had participated in threesomes with a few couples.  I asked her if she'd be open to hooking up with another couple or doing threesomes with me, and of course, she jumped at the idea.  We haven't done this yet, but when we do it will be outside of whatever time we spend together.  And there will be no financial terms for that fun.


As for Leah, we had one more encounter which I will detail in the next post, as it led to a huge lesson for me.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

The End (And This Time I Mean It)

Those of you who have read my blog, West Coast Sugar Daddy Journal, since I began it in October 2012, have traveled with me over my nearly six-year journey as a Sugar Daddy.  I have, in that time, had encounters with a total of 36 different women.  Of these, just a dozen were women with whom I'd been with more than one time.  The rest were one-off encounters.  Some would maintain I treated these girls like hookers.  But they'd be wrong.  Except for those I saw during the time that I was actually with C (not those times when we were "broken up"), I fully intended to be with each of them for at least a few months.  The last 18 months, since my final breakup with C, have been very difficult indeed.  I had been spoiled with a great girl, though a deeply flawed one, for three years, and there were only two since that time -- Leah and Lola -- who seemed to have the qualities in a mistress that C had.


And now, with a renewed commitment to working things through with DW, my heart simply hasn't been in it to continue searching for quality girls.  On top of that, the financial toll it has taken on me and my family to continue doing this has been at times very large.  It no longer makes emotional or financial sense for me to continue in the Sugar Bowl.


I cherish each and every experience that I've had.  I don't regret a single thing I've done.  There's really no room for it, anyway.  Time to move on, focus my attention on work and family, and take all of the lessons I've learned and apply them to my future life.


Will I stop having extramarital sex?  At least for now, yes.  But, like my friend, David Montrose over at Sugar Daddy Diary, or my secret fantasy lover, Exa Palmateeri at The Sugar Daddy Diaries, I am done with the Sugar Lifestyle. 


The seductiveness of going back to Seeking Arrangement to find another mistress to play with just seems unpalatable to me now.  I'd go back to the site to pull down my profile, but better just to stay away.


As I have blogged about nearly every meaningful encounter, good and bad, that I have had in the past six years, there's very little else for me to cover.  The rebuilding of my marriage will be for me to keep private, though I might at some point in the future write about it in some other forum. 


To those of you around the world who have read my blog, shared their stories and comments with me, asked me for advice, or thanked me for being honest about my writing, I am very grateful for your input over the past 18 months.  This blog has been a fantastic outlet for my creativity, and helped me process the end of my relationship with C, which, in retrospect, was an unwise expense for my heart (though, of course, with no regrets for what I have learned from it). 


The end feels extremely sad for me, I must admit.  In fact, I struggled with clicking on the "Publish" button for the last five minutes before posting this piece.  But, overall, I am so pleased with the experiences I've had, both as a Sugar Daddy (great sex, yo!) and a writer.


First, a special goodbye to all my ladies:


T (Anita)
L (Lina)
K (Katie)
C.A. (CC)
Selina
K (Nikki)
K (Susan)
A (Space Cadet)
Ch (Cha-cha)
Candy
Jill
Sha
D (Paulina)
J (Zen)
K (Kyra the porn star)
S (Dale)
J (Kim)
P (Jayde)
E (The Dancer)
Julie
T (Joni)
K (Wanda)
J (Song)
L (Lola)
D (Jade)
Michelle
J (Sam)
K (K-bear)
L (Audrey)
L (Elle)
T (Leah)
D (Star)
J (Belle)
A (Chica)
N (Naira)


And especially to CNH (Hayden), the woman who changed my life forever.  Thank you again, for all the fun, for your beauty, for your kindness, for your honesty, and for your affection.  I'll never forget you, ever!


And to all of you,


Goodbye.


Porter Edwards 





Audrey Becomes More Real

I posted last week that Belle canceled our second date because she'd gotten her period.  As I had already withdrawn the money for our date, and packed it inside a sweet card, I didn't see the point in re-depositing it.  Earlier in the week I had told Audrey that I'd like to see her again, but didn't know if I'd be available on the Friday she wanted to meet.  But, as luck had it, I suddenly found myself available.


I texted Audrey right away, and she replied that she had the afternoon completely open.  I found a hotel close by (next door to the hotel where Sam and I had hooked up) and booked a room.


Due to traffic, we both arrived late.  I checked in and realized that there'd be no time to get clean before she arrived, so I figured I'd clean up with her there.  When Audrey showed up, she smelled sweaty and felt a little damp.  I guess she'd had the heat on in her car!  Since I wanted to be clean, I suggested that she join me in the shower, and she consented.


As she took off her clothes I noticed that she'd put on a few pounds.  Well, I had also gained weight, but five pounds on me shows up a lot more subtly than it does on someone as petite as Audrey.  And all of it went to her butt.  All of a sudden, two months later, Audrey looked a little less ideal and a lot more like a normal girl.  A normal girl with an unbelievable sexual appetite.


We stepped into the shower and I grabbed the soap to get her all soaped up.  She did the same to me, using a good deal of it to stroke my already-hard cock.  I reached between her legs while we kissed, and found her pretty wet (duh, we were in the shower, but that's water, not "juices").  She knelt down and started blowing me, which I thoroughly enjoyed, particularly when she sucked on my balls.


We dried off and pulled the cover off the bed.  She continued her blow job, which was OK, not fantastic.  Good effort, less teeth than last time.  I felt her pussy with my fingers, and she had gotten even wetter than before.  I rubbed her clit, which elicited moans from her while my cock was in her mouth.  Very hot.


Soon, however, I flipped her on her back and pushed her legs wide apart to go down on her.  She loves receiving oral, so I went to town with enthusiasm!  "Finger me," she begged.  I stuck my index and middle fingers inside her and rubbed her g-spot.  Her hips twitched over and over, and she came all over my face.


I kept her in that position and started to enter her without a condom, but she got up from the bed to get something from her purse.  I figured we'd be using condoms, but she came back with just a bottle of lube.  I forgot the name of it, but it was so much better than the Astroglide I have always used.  I'm going to have to get this stuff the next time I need it at home (in 2017, probably!).  She said she'd gotten in at a sex shop.  She just used a little on me and a little on her, and I slid in so easily, and it didn't feel too slick.  Just enough friction to make it feel perfect for me.  Too perfect, in fact, as I was ready to climax in about a minute.  She got on top of me and rocked back and forth which was even more unbearably delicious.  I grabbed her by the waist to slow her down.  After a few minutes, however, I couldn't take it any longer.  I came full force  inside her.  Once she got off me, she went to the bathroom to clean up.  (In case anyone is wondering, she's on the pill.)  We fucked one more time about an hour later, but that lasted maybe ten minutes.  Although she came this time, I felt pretty useless not being able to last any longer.


We spent a couple of decent hours together before I had to head home.  Audrey's body and personality, the second time, did not elicit the kind of response I'd had last time.  I felt like she and I had connected very well after the first time, but even though she'll have her own apartment next month, I don't think I want to see her anymore.  More to be revealed about that in my next post...

Friday, March 14, 2014

Belle and Aunt Flo Send Me to See Audrey

Belle texted me two hours before our date today that her Aunt Flo arrived unexpectedly and that she was out of commission.  Immediately I texted Audrey to see if she were free, and to my great pleasure, we have a date in three hours.  I can't fucking wait to see her again.  Some of the best sex I've had in a long time, without the nagging unnecessary connection I had with Leah.

Belle's body set her back several hundred bucks and two more weeks.



Friday, March 7, 2014

Goodbye, Leah

Leah sent me a text last night, perceptive girl that she is, asking me if I was upset with her "or something."  I seized this text as my opportunity.  Not wanting to use text messaging to break up with her, I sent her an email.
Hey, Sunshine --

So sorry I wasn't responding to your texts.  I was on the phone this afternoon, then in the car, then having dinner with the family, then putting the kids to bed, and now have a few moments.

It's been a roller-coaster of a week, mostly good, some setbacks at work, but mostly I've had a lot on my mind.  You are actually very perceptive, but it's not you I'm mad at.  It's me.
I know this is going to come as a surprise because we've been having so much fun, but I must end our arrangement. Please know that you haven't done anything wrong; if anything, you've done the opposite.  What we began building together is exactly the kind of arrangement I have been looking for, on many levels.  But when I started my life in the "sugar bowl," I made a commitment to myself that, in order to protect myself, my family and my career, I would never get involved with anyone I knew, either directly or through someone else.  Unfortunately, I have not honored that commitment in deciding to get involved with you.  You are your mother's daughter; that's never going to change.  While I don't regret anything that I've done or that we've done together, I now see my initial decision to begin this arrangement as an error in judgment.  I believe that, in assessing my own feelings about you and about our involvement, I could upset multiple lives if I allow myself to remain in a relationship like this any longer. 
I was drawn into the idea of doing something so taboo, but it's exactly that riskiness that I've worked so hard to avoid all these years.  I simply can't continue.

I've known for about a week or so that I needed to tell you this, and I've struggled with how best to do it.  In reading this email, you now know how I ultimately decided to do it.
We did agree at the outset that we would take this slowly and a step/date at a time and gauge our feelings about getting involved.  While it may have appeared that I was at ease with all or some of it, in truth I struggled from the beginning.  In hindsight, if I had it to do again, I would not make the same decision.
I know this might upset you or hurt your feelings.  I am so sorry if I have caused you any pain; it is not my intention.  You have been nothing but totally sweet, caring, fun, and a source of light in my otherwise dull life.  I do hope that at some point you can understand that this is the right decision for me. 
Of course, I wish you nothing but happiness and success in your future.  You're such a special woman; I am so glad we got to know each other a little bit.
Take care, Sunshine!  Be brilliant and be happy!
This morning came a text: "I totally understand.  This will be our secret brief encounter.  Wish you all the best."

Can't help but feel sad, the way I feel sad whenever I cut off someone I care about.  It happened a little with CC, a little with Wanda, a little with Dale, a little more with Lola, and of course you all know how I dealt with the breakup with C.   Leah is a really great girl: beautiful, sexy, intelligent, and kind.  But I have to honor my commitment to myself about being more discreet.  Of course, living a mile away from Belle is within my five mile buffer zone, but if I have to compromise somewhere, I'd rather take my chances there.  I'm pretty good at being sneaky, and when I go into a woman's apartment I always look like I'm there to do business.  Getting caught with a friend's daughter is a recipe for disaster, and many, many lives would be at stake.  So the chapter now ends.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Belle or Audrey?

Audrey and I have kept in contact with each other over the past couple of months since we slept together.  There's good reason for this, of course: I consider my experience with Audrey to be at or near the top of the sexual experiences I've had in the past 18 months, since things ended with C.

Not to discount the amazing experiences I've also had with Leah in the past month or so.  Our first time together staggered me.  Leah has all the qualities I want in a Sugar Baby, but she has one that, in hindsight, disqualified her from the start.  I don't regret the decision to sleep with her, but I definitely made a mistake in starting an arrangement with her.  Lesson definitely learned.

Audrey's negatives -- her loud voice, her average looks, our families' connection to the same house of worship -- combine to make me cautious.  Then again, I always try to be cautious, even though I have at times demonstrated a spectacular myopia when it comes to being careful.  These negatives, however, fall short of Leah's singular negative attribute (her being the daughter of my high school friend).  Also Audrey currently has roommates, which is a huge negative for me.

On the positive side, Audrey is an animated, passionate, giving, game, and skilled lover.  She displays patience and self-assuredness, especially during the conversations we've had since our hook-up.  I wouldn't call her an intellectual equal, but she can hold up her end of a conversation.  I imagine she's much more well-read than I perhaps imagine her to be.  On her living situation, Audrey said she'll be moving into her own apartment by late April.  I find this very encouraging.

Now, Belle has amazing qualities as well.  Her sexuality rivals Audrey's, rivals C's, rivals CC's.  She is extremely talented.  I find her physically very attractive, though not as attractive as C or Leah.  She's playful, thoughtful, street-smart, and resourceful.  I am attracted to her neatness as well (in hindsight, C's messy apartment would have been a turn off to some degree had I not already loved her).  She has negatives too: she lives too close to my house, she has pets (although she keeps her dog in day care while she's away for the day and while she hosts me), and she can be a little detached and not as attentive as some of the other girls I've "dated."  In other words, I like a lot of communication in between dates, and we had threadbare conversations leading up to our first date, so I was a little wary of whether or not we'd hit it off in bed or afterward.  So far so good, though.

All this mental masturbation leaves me in an indecisive place: Audrey, or Belle?  I like them both, but can't afford to play with both of them.  This conundrum will occupy my thoughts for the time being.  To you, dear readers, I offer my humble dilemma in the hopes that you'll provide some perspective that I don't have right now.

Next week, I'm supposed to see Belle again, and I'm looking forward to it.  If this problem doesn't get solved until later, that's OK too.  I can keep talking to Audrey until she moves into a new place and then hook up with her again once she's settled in.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Balled by Belle, Part 2

The kissing didn't proceed straight to her bedroom.  She poured herself a glass of wine.  "Sorry, babe," I said, "but I can't join you there.  Can't go home with wine on my breath!"  She barely sipped from it during our chat, and the glass didn't follow her upstairs when we eventually headed up there.

I sat on her brown couch, admiring her fastidiously neat apartment (such a welcome change from both C and Leah, who were both not very adept at keeping house).  She sat next to me and lay her legs across my lap, her foot right on top of my crotch.  Ah, I thought, well-played.

Belle is auditing classes right now because her financial aid came too late for her to enroll in any classes at the beginning of the term.  She's hoping her professors take pity on her and let her in.  I was thrilled to hear stories about life on her campus.  One thing she was quick to point out that she, even at her age, is getting hit on by younger students.  Her face definitely looks young, so that doesn't surprise me.

After about ten minutes of chat, she leaned over and gave me another kiss (or should I say many kisses).  We decided that it was time to play, and she led me up the stairs to her bedroom.  Again, super neat.  She had two cats, who upon seeing a strange man approaching, darted under the bed and stayed away the whole time.  We spread out on the bed and started making out, eventually getting all our clothes off.  Belle has pierced nipples and she says they're very sensitive, so I just had to play with them a little, despite her warnings that she really doesn't like them played with that much.  Once I licked one of them, however, I think she decided that maybe she does like it if I play with them.

I noticed a number of tats on her body.  No huge tats like Elle, however, thank goodness!  Funny mentioning Elle, though: I'd have to say that Belle's body resembles Elle's in almost every way, except that Belle is in much better physical condition.  She clearly exercises regularly, whereas Elle was flabby nearly everywhere.

Now, as much as I wanted not to hear any comments about the size of my cock, Belle couldn't resist saying a few things, all complementary, about it.  I took them all in stride and downplayed the whole issue.  "Please save your applause until after the performance," I said, which cracked her up. 

I got to go down on her first, which I always prefer.  She enthusiastically received my attention, but I'm pretty sure she didn't climax.  She gladly returned the favor.  I got a fantastic blow job, right up there with all the great blow jobs I've gotten in the past six years.  I got on top of her and poked my head inside her for just a bit, which got me a push back and a head shake from Belle.  I reached for the condoms and she got the lube.  We got ourselves ready and I started on top, but we got to do all positions.  During doggy she told me to spank her, hard.  Who am I to refuse such a command?  Her ass got red, but she loved it!

Belle really likes being on top, and she got to grind on me very aggressively, which I really liked.   I hadn't used a condom in quite some time, so it felt a little different, with my sensitivity diminished quite a bit.  I like that I could last longer, but to be honest, we were fucking pretty hard and I got tired.  I slowed things down with her on top.  Oh, my God, I got so deep I could feel the back of her vagina.  This actually turned her on, which surprised me, as other girls always complained of pressure, likening it to having my balls squeezed really hard.  Oh well, I thought, go with the flow!

Once I felt ready I flipped her over and got on top of her again.  She came for the second time while I had her legs over my shoulders, pounding away.  I finally felt my climax coming.  She was so wet, however, that I didn't feel myself pop out of her until I was coming, thrusting between her thighs.  Still felt awesome!  She told me later that she came again right at that time, and she clenched and pushed me out, but I'm not so sure of that.  We were pounding pretty hard.

Exhausted and sweating, I got off her bed, rolled off the condom and deposited it into her bathroom trash can.  We held each other for a while, chatting.  She got between my legs and lay her breasts down on my sleeping dick.  She ran her fingernails all up and down my chest, my arms, and the inner parts of my thighs.  "I'm a toucher, I'm sorry," she said, "I have to touch you everywhere."  "I love it," I replied, "keep going!"

The second time we had sex, she sucked me till I got ridiculously hard and she climbed on top of me.  "I know my body," I said, "I'm pretty sure I won't come again, but have at it."  "I won't come either," she said, "but I want you!"  She didn't even bother with a condom this time, just slipped me inside her.  We stayed in this position the whole time.  Wouldn't you know it, after about 10 minutes, I felt like I was going to come again, and I told her.  She took me out and started sucking me, but for some reason I felt my climax recede.  "Too early, I guess," I said.  I grabbed my cock and stroked away, while she put her mouth on the head and licked me all around.  Fucking hot!  I came a minute later and she took it in her mouth, swallowing it.  Great girl!

We showered together to clean off, kissing and holding each other the whole time.  After I got dressed, we went back downstairs and said our goodbyes. I will definitely be seeing her again, hopefully many more times.

One thing came up as I left.  Because Belle lives less than a mile away, it took me less than five minutes to get back home, and this gave me pause as I drove.  With nearly every other girl, I've had to travel 30-45 minutes to get back home, and sometimes I've even had to stop off somewhere to pick up a kid from some extracurricular activity.  That time, I realized, is pretty valuable for me to settle down and re-orient myself to being back in the family environment.  It felt jarring to get in the house, see DW, and have my "Hi, honey, I'm home!" moment, complete with a hug and kiss.  I wondered if Belle's smell was on me still, despite the shower I took (with unscented Ivory soap, thank God!).  I puttered around the house for a few minutes once walking in the door, heading to the bathroom to pee, doing  a stray hair check on my clothes and in my own hair, and then spending a couple of minutes checking my phone for emails or texts or Facebook messages, then going over to one of my kids and saying hello, all before I went over to DW.  She didn't say anything before, during, or after this display, so maybe this was just my head trying to fuck with me.  Still, I think I'm going to have to figure a way to do an errand or something after seeing Belle (like getting gas, stopping for a grocery or two), just so I can clear my head for a minute before walking in the door.


Monday, March 3, 2014

Balled by Belle, Part 1

My day started upside down.  I was supposed to go straight to the bank from home to pick up my cash for today, then to the drugstore to pick up condoms and a card, but I got on auto-pilot and started heading to the office instead.  The weather made traffic unbearably heavy, so it was too late to turn back around.  I decided I'd take care of things on my way to Belle's place.

I put in about four hours at the office before I had to take off.  I figured traffic would be a nightmare, so I gave myself 30 minutes to take care of the errands, and another 60 minutes to travel back to my neighborhood, which was where Belle also lived.

Turns out the drive to the bank took only five minutes, plus another five minutes to take care of the cash withdrawal.  As I turned the corner to head to the freeway (another five minutes), I saw a 7-11 on my right.  I pulled in, knowing I'd be able to get condoms there.  This particular store was a larger than usual place that was more like a little neighborhood grocery than a convenience store.  Both registers had lines, so, with condoms in hand, I waited for my turn.  Ahead of me was a very smelly old Asian lady, likely homeless, carrying a burrito in her hand.  She got to the register, but had no money to pay for it.  Some nice woman paid the $3.00 for the burrito about two minutes later, and I was out the door once I handed over my money. 

Traffic to my neighborhood turned out much lighter than expected (mid-day, in the rain, on a Friday?) and I arrived in my neighborhood about 30 minutes early.  While waiting at a red light, I dashed off a quick text to Belle: "Hey, traffic was light, and I'm only five minutes away."  No immediate response.

Here is where things got dicey for me.  My route to Belle's apartment took me through an intersection that I knew DW would cross right around this time, as she headed over to the school to pick up one of our kids.  How would it be if she just happened to notice her husband's car crossing the intersection in front of her at a time when I would have been hard at work?  Luckily that didn't materialize, but I kept it in my head for the next time.  There was no really clean way to get around this intersection, so I'd just have to time it right.  Part of the real danger in hooking up with someone who lived close to home.

I got to Belle's street and made a left turn to head to her building.  Oh no, I thought, Belle lives right down the street from another school in our neighborhood (hadn't thought of that), and that school was just letting out.  A whole crowd of parents waited in front of the school for their kids.  Off the top of my head, I could think of probably half a dozen parents I knew who had kids at this school.  As I drove past the school, I acted nonchalantly, but looked around for familiar faces.  Not finding any, I sighed with relief and proceeded the two more blocks to Belle's building.  I was 25 minutes early.  I parked and debated whether to send Belle another text.  A minute or so later came one from Belle: "Sorry!! You're going to have to hang tight!!!  Give me a bit."  So I waited....

At the appointed time, or a minute or two later, she sent me a text telling me how to get to her specific apartment.  After I knocked, I heard her say, "It's open!"  I opened the door and stepped inside, and she greeted me wearing a dark knit sweater over black leggings.  Once I'd put down my stuff, she grabbed me and gave me a hungry kiss, much more passionate than the one we shared at lunch a couple of weeks before.

... to be continued...

Friday, February 28, 2014

Sugar Baby or Hooker? Sugar Daddy or "Hobbyist?"

There are many who argue that this whole Sugar Baby/Sugar Daddy arrangement shit is nothing more than a more subtle form of prostitution.  Essentially the argument goes like this: if a woman agrees to have sex with a man in exchange for money, gifts, dinners, trips, etc., she's a hooker, full stop.  If a man gives a woman any sort of valuable consideration in exchange for sex, then he's a john (I used "hobbyist" in the headline because that's what men who frequent hookers call themselves), full stop. 

I'm sorry, but these arguments are simplistic because those who make them are thinking one-dimensionally.  Further, I would wager that most if not all of them who hold to these arguments with certainty have never been in a Sugar relationship.  As someone who has been with both escorts and Sugar Babies, I know the differences, and they are vast.

First and foremost, when I would engage in sex with an escort, I never gave more than a momentary thought to who they were as people.  For me, they were selling a product and I was a buyer of that product.  Once in awhile, I'd meet an escort and enjoy a bit of conversation over some subject or other, but it was no more meaningful a conversation than one I'd have with the person checking my groceries, or fixing my car at the local garage.  The conversation passes the time, and nothing more, until both of us decide that the transaction has ended (usually when the next person in line gets annoyed enough!).  With my sugar babies, I nearly always spend just as much time (if not more time) conversing than fucking.  This is a huge difference to a hobbyist, who pretty much just gets in, gets off, and gets out.

Second, with nearly every one of my sugar encounters, even the one-offs, it was important for me and her to get to know one another before we hopped into bed.  On her end, she is looking for a man with whom she can feel safe, who shows some measure of charm and who is passably attractive to her. While I wouldn't go so far as to assert that we're looking for shared values, if we discover that there are shared values, it makes things so much better.  Because, in the final analysis we are looking for a relationship, not engaging in a business transaction.  Anyone who has read this blog from the beginning knows that these women are people to me (unless I get very mad at them or feel particularly sorry for myself when I get manipulated by them).  When I saw escorts, they were fuck-toys, some with better personalities than others.  I was with some really sweet escorts, and I encountered some horrible girls too.  But so what?  Here's your money, open your mouth, spread your legs, get me off, and thank you very much!  This was the arrangement, and was always understood.  No escort I ever saw ever complained that I wasn't a gentleman or an otherwise decent customer (especially those I saw more than once or twice).

Finally, while I haven't experienced this yet, I have read accounts of Sugar Daddies who have maintained friendships with their Sugar Babies long after the arrangement had ended.  I would like to have this kind of relationship, particularly with Leah or with C.  There isn't an escort I ever met who hoped to be able to see her customer as a friend after their transaction ended, and as a hobbyist I have never expected an escort to offer me her phone number so we could get together for coffee or a walk on the beach.

But there is an element to the simplistic argument I noted above that does resonate with me: every one of us, men, women, sugar or not, is a prostitute for something.  We have all sold ourselves at some point in our lives in ways we wished we hadn't in exchange for some needed and worthwhile benefit.  Those who reject that argument are liars.  Many of us have worked jobs we hate because we needed the paycheck.  We may have done business with a rude customer because the financial rewards were worth it.  Some women have remained in marriages with husbands who ignore their needs because a) there may be a status element to the marriage, or b) they have no marketable skills and could not survive on their own.  She may even have grown to loathe her husband over time, but because he makes a great living and she gets to have enough time to hang with her girlfriends, at the gym or over lunch at the country club, and they get to travel to nice resorts or on luxury cruises, she crawls into bed with him and puts up with his "three-minute mile" until she can watch The Tonight Show or a DVR of "Modern Family" after he falls asleep.

The final point I want to make is this: sex work need not be bad.  The simplistic argument above implies that it's a horrible thing to be likened to a hooker.  I've read enough accounts of sex workers who feel empowered to use their bodies and sexualities to be able to finance their way through school or make up for a financial shortfall when the job doesn't pay the bills.  If it goes well, everyone "comes" away happy; what could be bad about that?