Tuesday, March 18, 2014

The End (And This Time I Mean It)

Those of you who have read my blog, West Coast Sugar Daddy Journal, since I began it in October 2012, have traveled with me over my nearly six-year journey as a Sugar Daddy.  I have, in that time, had encounters with a total of 36 different women.  Of these, just a dozen were women with whom I'd been with more than one time.  The rest were one-off encounters.  Some would maintain I treated these girls like hookers.  But they'd be wrong.  Except for those I saw during the time that I was actually with C (not those times when we were "broken up"), I fully intended to be with each of them for at least a few months.  The last 18 months, since my final breakup with C, have been very difficult indeed.  I had been spoiled with a great girl, though a deeply flawed one, for three years, and there were only two since that time -- Leah and Lola -- who seemed to have the qualities in a mistress that C had.


And now, with a renewed commitment to working things through with DW, my heart simply hasn't been in it to continue searching for quality girls.  On top of that, the financial toll it has taken on me and my family to continue doing this has been at times very large.  It no longer makes emotional or financial sense for me to continue in the Sugar Bowl.


I cherish each and every experience that I've had.  I don't regret a single thing I've done.  There's really no room for it, anyway.  Time to move on, focus my attention on work and family, and take all of the lessons I've learned and apply them to my future life.


Will I stop having extramarital sex?  At least for now, yes.  But, like my friend, David Montrose over at Sugar Daddy Diary, or my secret fantasy lover, Exa Palmateeri at The Sugar Daddy Diaries, I am done with the Sugar Lifestyle. 


The seductiveness of going back to Seeking Arrangement to find another mistress to play with just seems unpalatable to me now.  I'd go back to the site to pull down my profile, but better just to stay away.


As I have blogged about nearly every meaningful encounter, good and bad, that I have had in the past six years, there's very little else for me to cover.  The rebuilding of my marriage will be for me to keep private, though I might at some point in the future write about it in some other forum. 


To those of you around the world who have read my blog, shared their stories and comments with me, asked me for advice, or thanked me for being honest about my writing, I am very grateful for your input over the past 18 months.  This blog has been a fantastic outlet for my creativity, and helped me process the end of my relationship with C, which, in retrospect, was an unwise expense for my heart (though, of course, with no regrets for what I have learned from it). 


The end feels extremely sad for me, I must admit.  In fact, I struggled with clicking on the "Publish" button for the last five minutes before posting this piece.  But, overall, I am so pleased with the experiences I've had, both as a Sugar Daddy (great sex, yo!) and a writer.


First, a special goodbye to all my ladies:


T (Anita)
L (Lina)
K (Katie)
C.A. (CC)
Selina
K (Nikki)
K (Susan)
A (Space Cadet)
Ch (Cha-cha)
Candy
Jill
Sha
D (Paulina)
J (Zen)
K (Kyra the porn star)
S (Dale)
J (Kim)
P (Jayde)
E (The Dancer)
Julie
T (Joni)
K (Wanda)
J (Song)
L (Lola)
D (Jade)
Michelle
J (Sam)
K (K-bear)
L (Audrey)
L (Elle)
T (Leah)
D (Star)
J (Belle)
A (Chica)
N (Naira)


And especially to CNH (Hayden), the woman who changed my life forever.  Thank you again, for all the fun, for your beauty, for your kindness, for your honesty, and for your affection.  I'll never forget you, ever!


And to all of you,


Goodbye.


Porter Edwards 





2 comments:

David said...

Wow, its been some run and your stories were fun to read. I will not wish you to write more, since you are getting out of the lifestyle to focus on more important life stuff.
All the best my friend.

Ed Porter said...

Thank you, brother. It was you who inspired me to write this blog, to process all the emotions that losing CNH brought up. It was you who has given me the idea to write my book. Don't expect any royalties though!

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